The Book
by silkendreammaid
Summary: It was a book. All Al did was steal it. Now he wonders how much is true. 10: The Book. Now complete.
1. Alphonse

**The Book**

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor ever will, Fullmetal Alchemist or the characters therein.

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**I: Alphonse**

Alphonse Elric was a thief.

He sat on his bed in their shared dorm and looked over at his sleeping brother. The moonlight coming through the gap in the curtains revealed a blanket-wrapped lump facing the wall that made snuffly noises every now and again.

Al opened his chest plate carefully. He did it so slowly he thought he could hear himself breathe, which he hadn't been able to do for years now. Almost noiselessly, he reached inside and with a swift jerk pulled the book he had taped to his insides free. He thought the room echoed with the sound. He looked over at the other bed. Nothing moved. He sighed in relief.

He looked down at the book. He had stolen it. From the State Library.

It had an innocuous red cloth cover and a slim ragged red ribbon for marking pages slipped through it. The pages were rather thin and it looked well-read. He had found it shoved in the corner of a top shelf, hidden behind dusty pamphlets on the alchemic uses of salt.

He opened it and looked at the title page.

_"The Flame Alchemist: An Unauthorised Biography._

_By Shamus Ghee."_

Al began to read.

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Author's Note: I did a drabble and it gave birth to this …and I have no idea where it's going… and I really should be writing my other stuff… and I apologise in advance…lol

silken :)


	2. Breda

**The Book**

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor ever will, Fullmetal Alchemist of the characters within.

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**2. Breda**

Alphonse looked down at the book and frowned metallically.

He wasn't sure he believed everything he had just read, some of it had been rather strange to say the least.

"What are you reading, Al?" Breda asked as he passed the large armour.

"Just this." And he held the book up.

Breda laughed. "Oh that. I haven't seen that book in a long time." He looked around. "Just don't let Mustang catch you with that. He really hates that book."

"Is it true or just made up?" Al asked curiously.

"_Some people_ say it's the complete truth, some say it's nothing but lies and others say there are hidden truths in it. I say it's a bit of everything." Breda lifted the book from Al's hands and flicked through it to a particular page. "Like this bit."

Al read the paragraph.

"_It is widely believed that Roy Mustang has always been the suave and sophisticated man we all know so well. It surprises many to learn that Mr Mustang still retains the ability to belch the alphabet despite years of abstinence from the cruder arts."_

"Is that true?"

Breda winked. "Sure as I'm standing here. I lost money on it."

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Author's Note: It's random because I'm not exactly sure where it's going... yet…lol

... I hope you enjoy...

silken :)


	3. Edward

**The Book**

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor ever will, Fullmetal Alchemist or the characters within.

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**3. Edward**

Al stood just outside the doorway of Colonel Mustang's office and half-listened to the curses of his brother as the Colonel taunted him in their familiar weekly ritual.

Words like 'shrimp' and 'shorty' echoed around the office and were generally ignored.

Al leafed through the book in his hands and he stopped at one paragraph.

"_During his first posting, Roy Mustang was the target of several bullies. Due to his eye shape and height he was accused of being of foreign extraction. It was during this time that he became adept at using verbal insults and Flame Alchemy. He was never bullied after that. These days Mr Mustang still resents comments about his height and has been known to severely flame anyone who does so."_

Al looked up and pondered. I wonder what Ed would do if he knew this?

Stomping footsteps warned him of his brother's approach so he slipped it quickly into his chest.

"What are you reading, Al?" Ed asked as he caught sight of the disappearing book.

"Nothing." Al said quickly. "Just some fiction." He added.

"Ugh, ok." Ed didn't like fiction but he knew Al did. "What's it about anyway?"

"A short alchemist." Al replied.

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Author's Note: Thank you so much to all who have read and reviewed so far.

They're still very random and that won't change...lol

silken :)


	4. Falman

**The Book**

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor ever will, Fullmetal Alchemist or the characters within.

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**4. Falman**

Alphonse thanked Warrant Officer Falman as the man retrieved his helmet from under the table where Ed had kicked it.

"Edward always reacts so strongly to those comments, Alphonse." Falman said with a slight smile.

"I know and I actually wasn't referring to him." Al sighed, slightly defensively.

The office was empty so Al pulled the book out and explained, much to Falman's amusement.

"Ahh, _that_ book." He said with a wide grin. "I haven't seen that book for awhile. I thought the Colonel had managed to destroy them all."

"Is it true, Sir?" Al asked. "Some of it seems very strange. Like this bit." Al opened to one marked passage.

"_In his first years Roy Mustang was such a stickler for Military protocols that he once wrote up his best friend for dereliction of duty for failing to complete Forms S32 and F25 correctly."_

Falman nodded. "So Lieutenant-Colonel Hughes tells it. He says he retaliated by wallpapering the Colonel's office and dormitory with every form he could find and then sent him completed maintenance forms in triplicate for it. Every day for a whole month afterwards." He paused.

"I think that's why the Colonel hates paperwork so much now."

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Author's Note: Don't you just love random sometimes…lol

silken :)


	5. Fuery

**The Book**

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor ever will, Fullmetal Alchemist or the characters within.

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**5. Fuery**

Kain Fuery was never happier than when he had a schematic drawing spread before him and a screwdriver stuck deep into the centre of a circuit board. Alphonse did not see him lying on the floor in front of the junction box and there was a loud clamour as Al tripped over him.

Al apologised profusely and helped Fuery collect all the spilled components. And then he showed Fuery his book and explained he had been too busy reading it to notice him.

Fuery giggled. "That book. Where did you find that, Al? Don't ever let the Colonel see that."

Fuery took the book and opened it. "I loved this book. This was always my favourite paragraph." He said and showed Al.

"_Roy Mustang is technologically incompetent. Given a piece of equipment that requires either careful handling or direction for its use and Mr Mustang is capable of destroying it within two minutes upon receipt of the item."_

Al stared at Fuery. "But I've seen him use the encrypting equipment."

Fuery nodded. "Yes. The Colonel's a lot savvier than people realise. Although he always manages to damage the Lieutenant-Colonel's camera."

"I think we'd all like to do that." Al muttered.

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Author's Note: I think I write these to stop myself from over-editing other stories, or to clear a block…lol… and they allow me to be completely random… the plot for this is so not there its rather remarkable…

And thank you for the nice comments and reviews so far... I always appreciate that...

silken :)


	6. Havoc

**The Book**

Disclaimer: I do not own, and never will, Fullmetal Alchemist or the characters within.

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**6: Havoc**

'_Roy Mustang has always been considered a 'ladies-man'. His skills and abilities in the art of seduction have been a source of immense gossip and speculation among his comrades for years. However, it is a little known peccadillo of Mr Mustang's that he does prefer blonds and will only ever sleep with them. He can also spot a fake at twenty feet.'_

Al tilted his head slightly. Surely this was rather personal information? How did the author know all of this, unless it was another lie?

"Ahh, you found _the_ book." Havoc's amused voice said. He reached around and read the page Al was looking at.

He shook his head, grinning. "Man, whoever wrote this sure knows Mustang well."

"You mean this is true?" Al gasped.

Havoc nodded. "Yep. The Chief has always gone for the blonds. That's why Hawkeye always has her gun on her."

Al shook slightly. "The Colonel and the First-Lieutenant?"

"No, Al. Hawkeye's not that stupid. She knows him too well." Havoc grinned. "And I smoke too much and Ed yells at him."

Al completely froze.

"But… you're both male." He said as calmly as he could.

Havoc pointed at the book. "He likes blonds, Al."

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Author's Note: I'm rather enjoying these… they're so light and random and pointless...lol

silken :)


	7. Hawkeye

**The Book**

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor ever will, Fullmetal Alchemist or the characters within.

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**7: Hawkeye**

Al sat on the steps outside Headquarters and looked at the book in his hands.

It was all so confusing, he thought. Some of it seemed to be true and some of it wasn't. It seemed to only be telling half the truth and being misleading with the rest. He couldn't decide if the author had been a veritable genius or a certifiable madman.

"Are you alright, Alphonse?" He looked up to see Hawkeye standing beside him.

"I'm just a bit confused, Lieutenant."

She saw the book and nodded. "If it's because of that book, then I understand, Al."

He tried to explain his confusion and she nodded again.

"I think the author intended it that way, Alphonse. Look."

She took the book from him and opened it to a page before handing it back.

'_Roy Mustang is known for his Flame Alchemy. He is also quite proficient in the use of small bore weapons, having once shot a perfect score in the Regional Trials during his Basic Training."_

"Really?"

"Yes, but he hates the sound of gunfire, that's why he relies on his alchemy." She smiled. "If you want to know the whole truth, you should visit the author."

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Author's Note: I know, it look like plot, but it isn't, I promise…lol

silken :)


	8. Hughes

**The Book**

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor ever will, Fullmetal Alchemist or the characters within.

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**8: Hughes**

Al went straight to Lieutenant-Colonel Hughes. If anyone could find the author it would be Maes Hughes. He would be able to use all the resources of the Intelligence Division to help him.

Hughes looked slightly taken aback when Al strode into his office, refused point-blank to look at his photos and held up a book instead. His green eyes lit up. He knew that book very well.

"How can I help you, Al?"

"I want to find the author of this, Lieutenant-Colonel. I want to know the truth."

"What do you expect the truth to be, Al?" Hughes asked curiously.

"Something more than the misleading half-truths in here." Al replied in a frustrated voice.

"Al, you can't know Roy's whole story. No-one can. Any book is only going to tell half the story. The only one who knows is Roy himself and he'd never tell." Hughes grinned. "Besides, this version is much more fun. Look."

"_Roy Mustang collects butterflies and has published, under various pseudonyms, several seminal works that are required reading for any budding lepidopterist."_

"That _can't_ be true!"

"It is." Hughes paused. "He used to have an ant farm, until I threw it out of our dorm."

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Author's Note: Nearly finished... two left, maybe a third if the prequel idea works out… hopefully they'll be as random as the rest have been…

silken :)


	9. Mustang

**The Book**

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor ever will, Fullmetal Alchemist or the characters within.

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**9: Mustang**

It had to happen and it did.

As Al was leaving Hughes' office he bumped into the Colonel and his brother and he dropped the book, title page up.

Edward looked at it casually and then looked closer. "Isn't this the short alchemist book you were reading the other day?" He asked curiously as he bent to pick it up.

"Do not touch that." Mustang said in a dreadful voice and Ed looked at him in surprise.

"It's just a book, Bastard." And he picked it up and opened it. His eyes widened at the title and he flipped the pages, his jaw dropping as he read random sentences.

Hughes stood in the doorway, grinning even as Mustang turned on him.

"I thought you said they were all destroyed?" He accused his best friend.

"I couldn't find them all, Roy." Hughes said nonchalantly. "You did manage to burn most of them."

"That's because its absolute rubbish, Maes!" Mustang's voice rose and became threatening. Ed and Al stepped back, Ed holding the book close to his chest and ducking behind Al for safety.

"I wouldn't go that far." Hughes said with a hurt expression.

"I would. You wrote the damned thing!"

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Author's Note: I know you all saw that coming…lol… it's the only plot there was… and one more chapter to come…maybe two...

silken :)


	10. The Book

**The Book**

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor ever will, Fullmetal Alchemist or the characters within.

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**10: The Book**

When Mustang snapped his fingers, Ed and Al had already begun running. Hughes felt his hair begin to smoke and ducked back into his office with a protesting shout as his hands started beating at his smouldering hair. Swearing, cursing and snapping echoed as Mustang followed him.

Al and Ed ran out of the building and didn't stop until they were a mile away. Ed sagged against a wall and looked at the book in his hand.

"I can't believe the Lieutenant-Colonel wrote this." Al said in a stunned voice.

Ed flipped some pages. "Butterflies? Ladies-man? Whoa, listen to these Al…"

"_Roy Mustang can sew his own buttons but was ten before he could tie his shoelaces."_

"_There are rumours that during a student revue in Mr Mustang's final year of school, he wore a mini-skirt."_

"_Roy Mustang is the only person to have completed the maze at Eastern Command without cheating."_

"Like you did, Brother"

"Shut up, Alphonse."

"What do we do with it now?" Al asked as they looked at it.

"Well, I'm going to read it." Ed said, grinning.

There was a sudden snap and the book burst into flames in his hand.

"No you won't, Fullmetal."

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Author's Note: And so it finishes... as pointlessly as it started…lol... and I haven't managed to figure out the prequel I was hoping for, but if I ever do...lol

Thank you for the reviews and the comments, they've all been much appreciated as always…

silken :)


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